On my way to the Camino 🚶‍♀️ Finding my Sage and the gifts from pain and suffering 🎁

They say your journey to the Camino de Santiago (The Ways of St. James) starts as soon as you decide to go and start planning the trip. Still, I didn’t know what that meant when I signed up to join my cousin Irisaida on her 50th birthday pilgrimage. 

My Camino started on October 27th, 2021, when I received the invitation to join Irisaida and four of her friends on the Camino Frances. Of course, I immediately said yes because this had been on my bucket list for some time, so the planning began. I quickly purchased my flights to take advantage of reasonable airfare and had planned to do some research for training and packing over the holidays. Still, as life would have it, I came down with the Omicron variant of Covid on December 23rd and spent my holidays in bed. “No problem,” I thought, “I will start planning in January once I am over this terrible virus.” 

January 10th was the first day I was 100% well. It was my first day back in the office since December 17th, and I was excited to get to work and prepare for my next Crushing Mental Fitness 6-week program. Shadow, my 15yr old chocolate labrador, had to go to the bathroom at about noon. I ran to open the kitchen door to let him out, but I was a little too late, and my poor baby had an accident in the kitchen on his way out to the yard. I started cleaning and wanted to hose down the kitchen stairs, but my husband had not replaced the broken hose. I had to improvise while being highly annoyed at my husband as I’ve been asking him to replace the hose for a few weeks. When I saw Shadow trying to get back inside, I quickly grabbed him by the collar to bring him in by the side door so that he wouldn’t drag the poop back in, but when we went to the door, it was locked. “The door that my husband had kept open for weeks is locked just when I need it to be opened,” I thought. I became even more annoyed, and as I turned around, I fell on the concrete stairs and floor. Ouch, the pain! I twisted my ankle and could barely walk when I got up. I first thought of my trip, the Camino, my ankle. “Oh no, this happened to my sister and spiritual mentor Liz when she was going on her Camino. If she could get well and still travel weeks or months after her injury, I should be fine too.” And so my pain and suffering began, and the last 70+ days have been unpredictable. 

I utilized the RICE method for a couple of weeks before realizing that I may need medical attention. I made an appointment with my fabulous Podiatrist Dr. Marizeli Olacio founder of Omega Group. Fifteen days later, I got the medical attention I needed for a torn ligament and contusion. I had to wear a walking boot for four (4) weeks. I then transitioned to a heavy-duty brace while doing therapy three times a week with Max Wolters DPT, CSCS, all in hopes that I could still make the Camino.

If that wasn’t enough, a week after I fell on January 17th, my husband had fallen asleep in the living room. When he went to get up to come to the bedroom, he fell on our living room floor. He is not sure how but his hand was super swollen. He, too, waited a week or so before getting medical attention, and when he did, they told him he fractured a bone. 

As humans, we were never promised that life would be perfect. If you are reading this, I bet you too have had your share of pain and suffering. Pain and suffering are necessary for us humans to appreciate the gifts that life brings us. Maybe your pain and suffering have not been as intense as some of the people you know or the stories you’ve heard. Still, I bet you’ve experienced an accident, betrayal, or life disappointment at one point or another. We all have, and the worst part is that we never know when it will come. We can plan and set goals, but life often turns out differently, and it’s up to us to see the gift and opportunities (Sage Powers).

As my husband and I were getting into the routine and on our way to healing a couple of weeks later, on February 2nd, we got the terrible news that my husband’s uncle passed away in a car accident and that his little cousin who was in the car with her grandfather was in ICU. So as if our physical pain was not enough, we now have this emotional pain and grief. Three days later, my maternal grandfather, Abuelo Alberto, passed away. 

When it rains, it pours, they say, ” Boy, did we get a storm in our way. I had planned for 2022 to be the year I would unleash the power within me and the power within my clients. Still, on February 5th, I had no idea if I would be able to do anything. But this is life. As Forest Gump said, “Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you are going to get.” 

As the weeks went by, my physical body was healing, and my heart was recovering. But before I could celebrate and start packing for my March 24th trip, I got my last test and challenge on my way to the Camino. 

In February, I noticed that my monthly menstrual cycle was late. I didn’t pay much mind to it because I realized all of the stress and emotional pain could have an effect on our hormones. I did find it strange as I am very regular but didn’t pay much mind to it. Almost 14 days later, the flood gates opened on March 3rd, and on Monday, March 14th, I started to get nervous. I was only 10 days from my trip, and how could I travel this way? I am now hijacked by my saboteurs and on edge because of what I’ve experienced over the past three months. I think of the worst and make an emergency appointment with the Gynecologist. I went in the next day, and the first thing the doctor says is, “you may need to cancel your trip.”

My heart started beating fast, and I wanted to cry. After all of this, no way…why? I did some of my PQ reps and took some nice breaths, and we continued the conversation. He rushed me to get a ton of blood work done and a couple of sonograms and gave me a prescription to stop the bleeding. The results started to appear in the portal on Friday, and the blood work showed that I was anemic. I didn’t understand the other results, so I patiently and nervously waited the weekend with all of my Camino packing items on top of my living room table because I was too nervous to pack. Finally, Monday comes along, and I get a message in the portal from my doctor’s office that he wants to see me ASAP. You can probably imagine how I felt. I nervously called to make an appointment, wondering what news I would receive and now basically getting mentally ready to possibly have to cancel my trip. They squeezed me in to see the doctor on Tuesday afternoon. I drive there doing PQs, breathing, and praying. I finally get to see the doctor, and he goes over the results with me and gives me the okay to travel along with some instructions. I took a deep breath and could almost cry from the excitement and relief that it wasn’t anything life-threatening or urgent.

The roller coaster is over for now, and I can pack to go on my Way to St. James. 🤗 “Thank you, Lord,” I thought! 🙏

Amid this pain and suffering, I’ve received many lessons and gifts thanks to my way of looking at life and my mental fitness practice. At 45, I am on my way and still learning! 🧠 💪


 

(Image provided by Positive Intelligence)

I want to share a few of my Sage lessons:

🧠 Because of my fall, I’ve been alcohol-free (no vino) since December 17th, and I feel fantastic! More on that in the future.

🧠 I am now more empathetic to physical pain.

🧠 I am now more aware and empathetic to the aging process with my dog, my grandfather, and my own body. I’ve realized that our body is our temple, and we need to take care of it.

🧠 I’ve really learned that I must let go of control. (This is one of my top saboteurs, and I must continue working on them.)

🧠 I’ve come to appreciate the importance of sleep and recovery.

🧠 I’ve been building new habits and allowing others to help me. 

🧠 I thoroughly appreciate the importance of having a good team (husband, doctors, physical therapist, and coaches)

I am off to the Camino! We depart tomorrow, March 24th. If you want to follow our walk, sign up to receive notifications of our “Seis Caminos – Women Empowerment” Blog. This post will be there, and you’ll get to meet my cousin Irisaida and the other four women walking with us. Here is the full link: https://browslasheshope.org/camino-blog

Until April – I’ll be on my way! 

xo, Vimari

 

(Image taken from REI – https://www.rei.com/blog/travel/how-to-hike-the-camino-de-santiago)

About Be Productive:

Founder, Vimari Roman helps professionals get out of paralysis analysis, gain confidence, and take massive action to succeed in the career that moves them.

Vimari began her career in Hospitality and after over 20 years, she found herself bored, frustrated and discouraged. She realized that she had outgrown her career and in 2013 transitioned her skillset, earned her CMM (Certificate in Meeting Management), and started her first company, Be Productive Meetings & Events. After a great start, she felt that something was still missing. She went inward and discovered that she missed the coaching and leadership component of her teams. A year later in 2014, she received her Global Leadership Certified Coach designation, and Be Productive Coaching was born.

Vimari serves clients from all over the world working virtually. With over twenty years of experience in leadership, she has successfully mentored and coached 100’s of high-performing professionals in various industries assisting their transition to living exciting lives, filled with purpose, greater career satisfaction, and higher pay. 🍎Check out how she can help you at www.beproductivecoaching.com

The Secret to Unleashing the Power Within #2022Goals

Imagine what would happen to your life if you were mentally fit. Suppose you knew that you couldn’t trust every voice in your head. If you learned how to discredit the Saboteurs in your mind by utilizing an operating system that will help you activate the emotions of empathy, happiness, and love. What if, in addition to those emotions, you were able to activate positive Sage powers while handling work and life’s greatest challenges? What if you could take calm and clear-headed action daily? What becomes possible for you, in achievement, in peace of mind and wellness, and your relationships?

I am here to tell you that this is all possible with Positive Intelligence (PQ). I am speaking from my own experience. Like many other people, I’ve spent my adult life working on becoming a better version of myself. I read and listened to many self-help books, took classes, training, and assessments, researched, only to apply what I could remember. That work and investment helped me become a better leader and achieve much of the success in my previous career. It also made my interest in personal development and human behavior grow. But much of this was focused on my career and dismissed the needs at home.

Not knowing that my top saboteur was the “Hyper-Achiever,” success depended on consistent performance and achievement for my self-respect and self-validation. I moved out on my own at the age of 17, immediately after graduating high school. I opted to work and focus on supporting myself while building my career in Hospitality vs. continuing college to become a Psychologist. These “Hyper-Achiever” tendencies made me focus on external success that led me to become a workaholic losing touch with deeper emotional and relationship needs.

I lacked empathy and looked at feelings as a distraction. I didn’t understand how someone could stay home from work because they had cramps and often judged them. I was great at covering up my insecurities to show a positive image to continue growing within my career. And although I’ve always been the life of the party (coming across as an extrovert), I kept people at a safe distance not to get distracted from my goals. This distance resulted in me feeling alone and misunderstood. You see, the “Hyper-Achiever” lied to me, telling me that life was about achieving and producing results. Yes, it helped me gain a lot but at what cost?

The shift in my life started in 2013 when I matured and realized that life wasn’t all about achieving and producing results. I was tired and lonely. Before finding Positive Intelligence, I continued working to grow my emotional intelligence (EQ). That work led me to get certified as a Leadership Coach. But, the “Hyper-Achiever” was still so very active, and it took a pandemic and a complete burnout for me to realize that I was at war AND I was determined to win.

There are no coincidences in life because God’s timing is perfect! Positive Intelligence arrived at the ideal time. Shirzad Chamine had just launched the program for Coaches in 2020. As a result of the pandemic, his vision was to create a world where mental fitness was accessible to everyone. He could do that by offering the gift of this program to coaches. I was introduced to the work by my friend and colleague and completed the program in February. After completing the program, just like that, I no longer felt burned out, and I felt happier with a clear-headed focus.

In only six weeks, I realized how much my life had changed that I wanted to provide that gift to others. I realized that I needed to incorporate Mental Fitness into my coaching practice. On March 26, I joined Shirzad’s vision, getting certified as a Positive Intelligence Coach. As the year was coming to an end, nine months later, I received my official certification as a Certifed Positive Intelligence Coach, aka Certified Mental Fitness Coach.

So as I move forward with 2022, I tell you that the secret behind unleashing the power within is Mental Fitness. Now is the time to take action so you can start 2022 with a bang and let this New Year be the year that you unleash the power within. 🧠💪🏼

Don’t just take my word for it. Listen to what some of my clients have to say:

 

Today I invite you to please join Shirzad and me in manifesting this vision where we live in a world where everyone around us is mentally fit. Do your part by becoming mentally fit yourself. Be the change you want to see in the world.

You can do that by joining my next Bootcamp starting on Sat, January 15. This app-guided program will teach you step-by-step how to build lasting new positive habits so that you can respond to life’s challenges with a more positive mindset. 📈

Vimari Roman your Certified Mental Fitness Coach will be leading our group meetings and supporting you throughout the program to help you transform your performance, wellbeing, and relationships. Ready to strengthen your mental muscles to deal with challenges with less stress and greater clarity? Register today!

Register today via Eventbrite and receive a 22% Discount. 🔗 www.eventbrite.com/e/208848921747/?discount=FriendsofBeProductive

About Be Productive:

Founder, Vimari Roman helps professionals get out of paralysis analysis, gain confidence, and take massive action to succeed in the career that moves them.

Vimari began her career in Hospitality and after over 20 years, she found herself bored, frustrated and discouraged. She realized that she had outgrown her career and in 2013 transitioned her skillset, earned her CMM (Certificate in Meeting Management), and started her first company, Be Productive Meetings & Events. After a great start, she felt that something was still missing. She went inward and discovered that she missed the coaching and leadership component of her teams. A year later in 2014, she received her Global Leadership Certified Coach designation, and Be Productive Coaching was born.

Vimari serves clients from all over the world working virtually. With over twenty years of experience in leadership, she has successfully mentored and coached 100’s of high-performing professionals in various industries assisting their transition to living exciting lives, filled with purpose, greater career satisfaction, and higher pay. 🍎Check out how she can help you at www.beproductivecoaching.com

Unleash the Power Within in 2022: Goal Setting Tips

The first Monday of 2022 has approached and the anticipation of the New Year is still in full swing. You are back to work, kids are back at school and you sort of feel like the same person you were on Dec 31st. Shhh, I have a secret, you are the same person as you were on Dec 31st and that’s beautiful.

So many of us get anxious as the New Year approaches and our minds go crazy with anticipation of what we will accomplish, what resolutions we will make, and how we can become brand new, then January 1st comes along and boom we are still the same person. What happened? We then get slowly into the New Year but we put off the diet, the going to the gym, the goal-setting all because Jan 1st fell on a Saturday and we can wait to start everything on Monday. But Monday rolls around and… New Year and you are the same you, you feel the same and you don’t have the energy or same enthusiasm to start. Does this sound familiar?

If this sounds familiar then that’s because perhaps you have not made the internal and mental changes that need to be made. Change needs to come from within. Quality of life comes from our own feelings and emotions. You can make 2022 the year that you unleash the power within by the way you show up.

Cultivate how you want to feel by creating deliberate habits and incorporating the following internal changes:

  • Be Kind – to yourself and others
  • Let Go – of all the pressure and negativity, be stressfree
  • Be Present – slow down, be still, be mindful
  • Be Respectful – of yourself and others
  • Don’t judge – yourself or others and look at yourself and others with dignity and love
  • Keep Your Word – to yourself and others. Don’t break promises that you make, especially to yourself.
  • Be Grateful – it’s the little things. Where focus goes energy flows. Focus on what you are grateful for.

Create these habits by using the 21/90 rule: It takes 21 days to break or make a habit and if you do it for 90 days then it becomes a way of life.

Once you commit to making the internal changes then you can start to reflect on the previous year, your life, and the goals you want to set for the year.

Here’s how you can make 2022 the year you unleash the power within without the anxiety of the New Year resolutions:

  • Get Clear: Do a self-assessment of where you are in every area of your life.
  • Create a Vision: Whom do you want to be? What kind of person do you want to become? On Dec 31, 2022, what do you want to look back to and be proud of?
  • Set Goals: Set Goals that support the person you want to be in the next 12 months so that you can have an extraordinary 2022. Be ambitious about your goals and take command of your life by making them happen regardless of the outside circumstances.

Be Productive Coaching New Year Goal Setting

For the last several years I’ve broken up my life into twelve (12) areas and I’ve written a minimum of three (3) new year’s goals for each of those areas.

As we enter 2022, I invite you to do the same. Following I share the twelve (12) areas (in no particular order). If you feel there is an area that I left out, go ahead and insert that area into your goals for the new year. If you would like me to email you the free New Year Goal Setting worksheet email me your request at vimari@beproductivecoaching.com

Here are some tips for getting ready to set your new year goals:

  • Get yourself into a relaxed state of mind (pray or meditate and take some deep breaths)
  • Sage or light up a candle or incent (this is a good way to cleanse the room that you are going to be sitting in and bring in good energy)
  • Grab your favorite pen or pencil and write your goals on a piece of paper or in your journal.
  • Dream: Be open and do not limit yourself.

Start by writing the following statement at the top of the page:

“I accept these things into my life now or something better for my highest good and for the highest good of all concerned.”

  1. ATTITUDE: MENTAL/EMOTIONAL – EXAMPLE: Do not judge, Let go and let God, Be Fearless, Be Joyful, Have more focus, etc.
  2. RELATIONSHIPS: SIGNIFICANT OTHER/FAMILY/FRIENDS – EXAMPLE: Date nights, Talk to my dad once a week, Spend time with my mom.
  3. SPIRITUAL – EXAMPLE: Pray daily, meditate, etc.
  4. PHYSICAL/HEALTH – EXAMPLE: Detox, exercise three times a week, etc.
  5. CAREER – EXAMPLE: Change jobs, go for promotion, etc
  6. EDUCATION/LEARNING – EXAMPLE: Get a certification, finish a degree, etc.
  7. FINANCIAL – EXAMPLE: Refinance house, pay off debts, etc.
  8. PLEASURE – EXAMPLE: Girls night out once per month, bowling weekly, etc.
  9. SERVICE/MISSION – EXAMPLE: Volunteer, Donate, etc.
  10. CREATIVITY – EXAMPLE: Take guitar lessons, draw, journal, etc.
  11. TRAVEL/ADVENTURE – EXAMPLE: France, Skydive, etc.
  12. GENERAL – EXAMPLE: anything else you may want to set a goal for or that you want to pay extra focus to like your romantic relationship or a big project.

Once you write out your goals:

  • Put them away in a safe place where you can access them monthly and take a look to see how they are coming along.
  • Choose one day out of the next 12 months that you will view your goals and evaluate your progress.

If you are an overachiever then you can also:

  • Write your goals using the Rapid Planning Method (RPM) – this will break down each goal on how you are going to achieve it. I teach this method to my coaching clients and you too can learn it or we can schedule a VIP Goal Setting Day. This is a 6-8 hour coaching and #strategy session focused on you. You will have the option to complete it between one session or two sessions. Each VIP day is customized based on your individual needs and here’s some of what we will work on together:
  1. Check-in with your values & purpose
  2. Clarify your vision for 2022
  3. Roadblock Clearing
  4. Goal setting
  5. Create an Action Plan

Apply to reserve your spot by scheduling a free consultation: www.beproductivecoaching.com/contact

Now get going and get started in unleashing the power within to make 2022 an extraordinary year!

Know someone who needs to unleash the power within? Share these tips with your friends on social media, via email, or LinkedIn.

Get Mentally Fit in 2022 & Unlock Massive Results in Every Area of Your Life! 

Maybe it’s transitioning your career to live out your greatest purpose, taking your relationships to a new level, or getting your physical body in shape.

The new year always comes with a list of resolutions and goals that are not attained. Research shows that 80% of new year resolutions fail by February. This is your opportunity to make 2022 your greatest year with Mental Fitness, Coaching, Career Strategies, and Professional Branding.

Sign up now for my next 7-week Mental Fitness Positive Intelligence Bootcamp and Get 22% Off before January 6, 2022

Click on the link to receive the discount: www.eventbrite.com/e/208848921747/?discount=FriendsofBeProductive

*The next 7-week Mental Fitness Positive Intelligence Bootcamp starts on January 15, 2022. Keep this discount for yourself or gift it to a loved one.

Want to include Coaching? Following are the 2022 applicable packages at the non-discounted pricing: 

Sign up now and receive 22% by clicking on the appropriate link to get these rates locked in today:

Unleash the Power Within 

Work/Life Happiness Transformation

Mental Fitness Transformation

Not sure which package is best for you? Schedule a free consultation: http://www.beproductivecoaching.com/contact

 

About Be Productive:

Founder, Vimari Roman helps professionals get out of paralysis analysis, gain confidence, and take massive action to succeed in the career that moves them.

Vimari began her career in Hospitality and after over 20 years, she found herself bored, frustrated and discouraged. She realized that she had outgrown her career and in 2013 transitioned her skillset, earned her CMM (Certificate in Meeting Management), and started her first company, Be Productive Meetings & Events. After a great start, she felt that something was still missing. She went inward and discovered that she missed the coaching and leadership component of her teams. A year later in 2014, she received her Global Leadership Certified Coach designation, and Be Productive Coaching was born.

Vimari serves clients from all over the world working virtually. With over twenty years of experience in leadership, she has successfully mentored and coached 100’s of high-performing professionals in various industries assisting their transition to living exciting lives, filled with purpose, greater career satisfaction, and higher pay. 🍎Check out how she can help you at www.beproductivecoaching.com

The good news after the Omicron Variant ⚡

Just the email I needed!

I’ve slept, I’ve watched movies, I’ve been quiet in my thoughts, I’ve walked my dogs, and I’ve slept some more, and I am rested. I should probably change my calendar to say omicron Covid vacation vs Christmas vacation. 🤦🏻

All kidding aside, I am alive and grateful.🙏🏼 Oh, and I am now officially a Certified Positive Intelligence Coach (CPQC) aka Certified Mental Fitness (PQ) Coach. 🧠💪🏼🙏🏼

This time last year, I felt exhausted and I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to think or create. I was #burnedout from serving non-stop and not really taking care of myself. Little did I know it was my top saboteur the Hyper-Achiever that caused this burnout. I was able to recognize it once I enrolled in the six-week Mental Fitness program that my friend and colleague invited me to take. On Feb 22nd I completed the program and just like that, I felt like that was the start of my 2021.

I had just returned from a trip to Greenville, SC where I was hoping to make that area my new home. I was so burned out that I thought moving would help. I went there with lots of hope and expectations but apparently, it wasn’t the time yet. What I did receive during that trip was clarity. Clarity on how I wanted to move forward with my coaching practice. I realized that I wanted to truly focus on transformations and I realized that Mental Fitness was going to be how I did that. In only six weeks, I realized how much my life had changed that I wanted to provide that gift to others. I was going to combine my God-given gifts and professional training as a coach with an operating system that would change lives forever. On March 26, I joined Cohort 5 and began my journey towards getting certified as a Positive Intelligence Coach.

Nine months later, as the year comes to a close, I finally received my official certification and the timing couldn’t be better. I’ve been sick with Covid and in bed since Dec 23rd and to receive this certification a week later was God’s message to me that this too shall pass and that 2022 is just around the corner waiting for me.

I am ready to make 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣2️⃣ the year that I finally unleash the power within and I want you to do the same.

Here’s to a year filled with health, mental fitness, joy, and prosperity! 🧠💪🏼🙏🏼

Cheers everyone!🥂🎉

Got Covid?

Our health is everything and taking good care of ourselves when we are sick helps us recover. Although not 100%, here are some tips that eight days later have helped me feel better:

  1. Drink lots of water – I feel that Coconut Water helped me a lot.
  2. Remove all stress – stress attacks your immune system and will delay your recovery.
  3. Movement – if you can go outside and walk a little fresh air does wonder and if you have a dog…take them out..it helped me have to take care of them and force myself to get out with them.
  4. Shower daily – yes, this may seem obvious but when you feel like crap sometimes it’s hard to get up. But like exercise, no one ever regretted a shower.
  5. Keep your skincare routine – or start one. I am so grateful for my wonderful skincare routine as it helped me feel good and almost normal.
  6. Change your sheets daily – ever wonder why at the hospitals they come in and change your bedding daily? I never thought about it until now but I decided to have clean fresh sheets daily and it made me feel so good. Plus hopefully, it kept the germs away.
  7. Use cozy socks and change your PJs daily – my sister-in-law gave me these cozy sleep socks for my birthday and boy did they come in handy. Having fresh PJ’s daily and the cozy sleep socks helped me enjoy my bed so much more.
  8. Download Instacart or a similar app – up to this past week I enjoyed shopping for groceries. I especially enjoy my Costco runs but I did the responsible thing by staying home and downloading this amazing app. Shopping was easy and I am afraid I may never uninstall it.
  9. Stay off Social Media – for the most part, we all know social media is not 100% healthy and while you are sick, life goes on. Seeing everyone else having a great time is not helpful for the immune system. Get off social media and enjoy your time off!
  10. Stay in the present – when thoughts start coming about what you are missing or what you need to be doing…dismiss them. Tomorrow will come and you will soon be able to catch up.

Get Mentally Fit in 2022 & Unlock Massive Results in Every Area of Your Life! 

Maybe it’s transitioning your career to live out your greatest purpose, taking your relationships to a new level, or getting your physical body in shape.

The new year always comes with a list of resolutions and goals that are not attained. Research shows that 80% of new year resolutions fail by February. This is your opportunity to make 2022 your greatest year with Mental Fitness, Coaching, Career Strategies, and Professional Branding.

Sign up now for my next 7-week Mental Fitness Positive Intelligence Bootcamp and Get 22% Off before January 6, 2022

Click on the link to receive the discount: www.eventbrite.com/e/208848921747/?discount=FriendsofBeProductive

*The next 7-week Mental Fitness Positive Intelligence Bootcamp starts on January 15, 2022. Keep this discount for yourself or gift it to a loved one.

Want to include Coaching? Following are the 2022 applicable packages at the non-discounted pricing: 

Sign up now and receive 22% by clicking on the appropriate link to get these rates locked in today:

Unleash the Power Within 

Work/Life Happiness Transformation

Mental Fitness Transformation

Not sure which package is best for you? Schedule a free consultation: http://www.beproductivecoaching.com/contact

Statistics are taken from the International Coaching Federation (ICF) 2009 Coaching Client Study.

About Be Productive:

Founder, Vimari Roman helps professionals get out of paralysis analysis, gain confidence, and take massive action to succeed in the career that moves them.

Vimari began her career in Hospitality and after over 20 years, she found herself bored, frustrated and discouraged. She realized that she had outgrown her career and in 2013 transitioned her skillset, earned her CMM (Certificate in Meeting Management), and started her first company, Be Productive Meetings & Events. After a great start, she felt that something was still missing. She went inward and discovered that she missed the coaching and leadership component of her teams. A year later in 2014, she received her Global Leadership Certified Coach designation, and Be Productive Coaching was born.

Vimari serves clients from all over the world working virtually. With over twenty years of experience in leadership, she has successfully mentored and coached 100’s of high-performing professionals in various industries assisting their transition to live exciting lives, filled with purpose, greater career satisfaction, and higher pay. 🍎Check out how she can help you at www.beproductivecoaching.com

Tis the season to get weatherized & make 2022 your best year!💪

We are all going to have some bad storms, are you weatherized? 

When the rainy & stormy season sets in, we need to be ready. If you live in cold weather, you know exactly what I am referring to, and you can relate. Fall is the season to get your car and home weatherized from the elements of nature. And while you are at it, I invite you to check in on your mind and spirit. Are they also weatherized? Are they ready for any weather? Especially the bad weather?

As humans, we all experience bad spiritual and mental storms…the question is, when will they arrive, and will we be ready when they hit?

Let’s take Christmas and the holiday season, for instance. The holiday season has approached, and our troubles and lives continue. Some may be dealing with financial issues, health, or relationship problems…and those troubles don’t disappear over the holidays. Others during this season are longing for connection and feel lonely or depressed. Some fill their time with holiday parties, shopping, and ways to feel connected. But then, disappointment arrives because of the expectations created.

So how do we weatherize our spirit and mind so that we can weather the storms of disappointment, stress, anger, health issues, and so on?

The answer is empathy for ourselves, others, and the circumstances around us. We can access empathy and compassion by asking ourselves, what is this situation teaching me? What gifts or opportunities is it offering me? What’s the most loving way I can respond to this situation before reacting?

We need to explore all factors and consider alternatives to disappointment, stress, anger, or despair. And we need to seek the wisdom within us and ask ourselves, at the end of my life, looking back, what would I want to remember about this situation? These questions will allow us to take positive action.

No matter how bad the weather gets and how many disappointments, we need to be ready so that we do not drown in despair. Getting ourselves prepared with mental fitness to bring in our Sage will help us cope with weathering any storm. Because when, not if, but when the storm hits, preparation will beat procrastination.

Here are some tips to get your mind, body, and soul prepared for the season:

  1. Consider taking a spiritual practice to quiet your mind.
  2. Start a gratitude practice. At the end of each day write down at least three things you are grateful for.
  3. Movement: Go for walks or exercise.
  4. Let go of expectations and let life and others surprise you.
  5. Stay in the present. The future brings anxiety and the past brings depression.

I hope these tips help you as you get “weatherized” to face the next storm. I share tips and provide you with support to be more productive and shine both in life and in your career. I’d love 💝 for you to join me by subscribing to be notified 🔔 when new articles are released.

Cheers to your success!

Vimari 💪🧠

 

Get Mentally Fit in 2022 & Unlock Massive Results in Every Area of Your Life! 

Maybe it’s transitioning your career to live out your greatest purpose, taking your relationships to a new level, or getting your physical body in shape.

The new year always comes with a list of resolutions and goals that are not attained. Research shows that 80% of new year resolutions fail by February. This is your opportunity to make 2022 your greatest year with Mental Fitness, Coaching, Career Strategies, and Professional Branding.

Schedule a free consultation to learn more!

Ready to get started? Register for the next Mental Fitness Positive Intelligence 7-Week Bootcamp starting on January 15, 2022. Register before Dec 15, 2021, to receive the Early-Bird Discount via Eventbrite.

About Be Productive:

Founder, Vimari Roman helps professionals get out of paralysis analysis, gain confidence, and take massive action to succeed in the career that moves them.

Vimari began her career in Hospitality and after over 20 years, she found herself bored, frustrated and discouraged. She realized that she had outgrown her career and in 2013 transitioned her skillset, earned her CMM (Certificate in Meeting Management), and started her first company, Be Productive Meetings & Events. After a great start, she felt that something was still missing. She went inward and discovered that she missed the coaching and leadership component of her teams. A year later in 2014, she received her Global Leadership Certified Coach designation, and Be Productive Coaching was born.

Vimari serves clients from all over the world working virtually. With over twenty years of experience in leadership, she has successfully mentored and coached 100’s of high-performing professionals in various industries assisting their transition to live exciting lives, filled with purpose, greater career satisfaction, and higher pay. 🍎Check out how she can help you at www.beproductivecoaching.com

Mental Fitness PQ – What it’s done for my life and practice

Mental Fitness PQ Graduates

Last year, when the world came to a halt, I was amid rebranding my company. The timing couldn’t be more perfect on April 15th when I launched my new website, and everyone was sitting at home with plenty of time to visit. My website analytics went through the roof, and I became busier than ever helping hundreds of clients deal with our new normal and rebrand themselves so that they could look to a bright future.🙌

As the world was trying to make sense of our new normal with Covid, I found myself burned out. I worked non-stop since Jan and during the pandemic. It was all good except that I did not stop to process the events of 2020. Seeing so many people laid off or furloughed my mind automatically went into fight or flight survival mode ensuring that I was helping as many clients as possible without stopping to take care of myself.🙉

In November, I drove to my first in-person conference to assist the Hospitality & Meetings Industry. The week following the conference I took a vacation to help my husband celebrate his 50th birthday. When it was time to get back to work my brain did not turn on. I was so burned out that I couldn’t think. I was speaking to my friend and colleague Rachelle Stone, ACC who was my coach at the time and that’s when she asked me to join in a six-week program based on the “Positive Intelligence” book written by Shirzad Chamine. I jumped on the opportunity knowing that it would help with my burnout, and I could not have imagined that saying yes to her would change my life and my coaching practice.🧠💪🏼

Fast forward, ten months later I have finalized my advanced training as a Mental Fitness Positive Intelligence Coach and am working on finalizing my certification. Since then, I’ve led 10 clients through the 6-week program and have witnessed amazing transformations.🙏

My graduates are now ready to face the world with strong mental muscles and their Mental Fitness Mo’Joe.💪🏼🧠

So, what is Positive Intelligence & Mental Fitness?

Mental fitness is a measure of the strength of your positive mental muscles (Sage) versus the negative (Saboteur).

Saboteurs react to challenges in ways that generate negative emotions such as stress, disappointment, self-doubt, regret, anger, shame, guilt, or worry.

Your Sage handles challenges through positive emotions like empathy, gratitude, curiosity, creativity, self-confidence, and calm, clear-headed, laser-focused action.

The relative strength of your positive Sage versus negative Saboteurs is called PQ (Positive Intelligence Quotient).

PQ is the measure of your Mental Fitness. It’s the best predictor of how happy you are and how well you perform relative to your potential.

You can boost your PQ significantly with practice.

Mental Fitness is the X-Factor
If you’re not physically fit, you’d feel physical stress as you climb a steep hill.

If you’re not mentally fit, you’d feel mental stress, such as anxiety, frustration, or unhappiness, as you handle work and relationship challenges.

80% of people score below the minimum level of mental fitness required for peak performance and happiness.

The great news? With recent breakthroughs in neuroscience and technology, you can now improve your mental fitness significantly within 6 weeks of practice.

The results? Dramatically improved performance and productivity and a calm, clear, and happier mind.

Breakthrough Research

PQ is a synthesis of recent breakthroughs in neuroscience, cognitive and positive psychology, and performance science.

Research included:

  • Hundreds of CEOs
  • Sales, Operations, and Technology teams
  • Stanford students
  • Elite athletes
  • 400,000 participants from 50 countries

This research was summarized in Shirzad Chamine’s book Positive Intelligence, a New York Times bestseller, translated into 20 languages.

The research reveals that:

  • Saboteurs and Sage live in entirely different regions of the brain.
  • You can cause a dramatic shift in brain activation to weaken Saboteurs and boost Sage.
  • 3 core muscles constitute mental fitness.

*Research and information are provided by Positive Intelligence.

Are you ready to change your life, feel happier, and achieve your highest performance? If yes, then join my next 6-week program starting on Oct 30, 2021. Following are the program details:

6-Week Program Outline

Register today to receive 10% off the registration in addition to the following Be Productive Coaching exclusive bonuses:

  • Week 7 – 12: New Grow Content included for three months in the Grow program of the app at no additional cost. ($30 per month – retail)
  • I (Vimari) will continue to be your mental fitness coach with one 50-minute monthly check-in for three months. ($900 retail)

Find out which saboteurs are hijacking you by taking the free assessment by visiting this link:
https://assessment.positiveintelligence.com/saboteur/overview
If you take the assessment, don’t forget to share your results with me via email at
vimari@beproductivecoaching.com

This work is fantastic, and I would love for you to experience it with me!

Whom do you need to forgive today?

“Forgiveness will unleash a power in your life that is underrated and often ignored.”   – Allen R. Hunt – Everybody Needs to Forgive Somebody

With forgiveness comes growth and grace for yourself and others. When we forgive others we are removing negativity from our hearts and minds. 

 I’ve truly never been one to hold grudges, anger, or bitterness in my heart towards anything or anyone. My motto since High School was “no regrets”. That meant that I gave myself permission to make mistakes, to love, and to live. When we truly live our lives we risk getting hurt and I can tell you that there have been many instances in where I’ve found myself having to forgive.

Unforgiveness and grudge hurt us more than it hurts the person that actually did the hurting, betraying, breaking of trust, and caused us intense emotional pain. Often times you’ll see that as my friend Nesa reminded me this week “hurt people…hurt people”. 

 I’ll share a little story with you. In 1994, what should have been perhaps my first great accomplishment as I was graduating from high school, turned into possibly one of the worst days I had experience in 17 years. This experience took place because a hurt person decided to hurt others. I’ll spare you the details but I’ll share enough to give you some overall context.

The incident ended in my first and last physical fight (other than being a young girl fighting with her brother and cousin). I reacted to someone’s disrespectful behavior towards me and a loved one. At 17, I didn’t really think about the consequences, I just reacted to the hurt. Up to this day, I have very faded memories of what took place immediately after the incident. But I can tell you that within just a few weeks or months that day turned into what I viewed then… as the biggest betrayal by a loved one.

After that betrayal, I didn’t speak to my loved one for a little while but due to the nature of the relationship, I was not able to keep that ugliness and grudge in my heart. But the bitterness and hatred that I felt for that other person were greater than any negative feelings I had ever felt. And if I have to be quite honest, those are still the worst feelings I’ve ever held in my heart towards anyone in my 44 years. I held those feelings for quite some time and truth be told, I can’t remember how long because I’ve erased much of that experience and those feelings from my heart and my mind. But in order to bring closure to this story, I have to share with you what led to the forgiveness. 

This is the first time that I am sharing this story. I think I’ve maybe shared it once or twice in the past with a close friend. Prior to forgiveness, I had nightmares often where I pictured a different ending to that physical fight. In many of those nightmares, I was able to get my revenge. One night, I had this horrible nightmare worst than any other.

**Warning..as this may be a trigger for some of you who may have faced physical abuse or violence. If so, then you may not want to continue reading.** 

Anyhow, in this nightmare, I was fighting with this person and I literally chopped their head off and grabbed the head by the hair, turned on the gas stove, and threw the head on top of my gas stove. As you can imagine that was a horrible nightmare to wake up from. I may not remember a lot or how long I held those feelings in my heart but I do remember that vivid dream. I woke up a wreck because that wasn’t me. That wasn’t an action that I would ever take or ever desire to take. That nightmare scared me. It scared me because I didn’t understand how my mind could go there. And that was the day that I decided to forgive.

That was the day that I realized that those feelings were only hurting me. This person had moved on with their lives and so had my loved one. Yet, I was holding this hatred and grudge in my heart. That was the day that I realized that bitterness and anger were holding me back from greatness. On that very same day, I got on my knees and prayed. I got on my knees and prayed for all those feelings to go away. And I realized that in addition to praying I needed to forgive for the feelings to actually go away. I had to say it out loud in order to relieve myself from what I was feeling.

I have to admit that as I write this to you today, I have tears coming down my face. I cry because in writing this I realize the power that came with overcoming that hatred and being able to forgive. I don’t cry because it still hurts, because it doesn’t, I cry because the hurt was significant, and it was a significant moment in my life.

Sometimes life gives us those significant moments in order for us to be stronger and to grow. And unfortunately, sometimes those moments come with suffering and pain. But until we forgive, until we forgive ourselves, until we forgive whoever hurt us…we are not able to move forward and grow. 

It takes a lot to forgive others and to forgive ourselves when we are the ones to put ourselves in hurtful situations. But that’s where we need to look up to our creator, look up to God and ask for strength. In practicing forgiveness we strengthen our mental muscles so that the next time we face something that hurts us we are able to utilize our mental muscles to help us move through that pain. We are able to activate the Sage part of our brain where positive emotions live (peace and calm, clear-headed focus, creativity, and big picture) to bring in the gift that situation has presented us. Because every situation, every heartache comes with a gift and we can access those gifts if we train ourselves to do so. Your Sage will help you access the gift of knowledge, power, and inspiration. 

Once we choose to see the gift, that gift will help us continue to move forward with forgiveness. In my story, I chose the gifts of knowledge and power. I remember learning whom to trust and allow in my life from that experience, and I also learned that I have the power to overcome my feelings and shift my thoughts. 

So, I ask you again, whom do you need to forgive today?

With love and gratitude, 

Vimari  

Mental Fitness is the X-Factor!

Interested in learning how to strengthen your Mental Muscles so that you can access your Sage and find the gift in everything?

I have one (1) seat left for my next 6-week Mental Fitness Positive Intelligence (PQ) Program starting this coming Saturday, Sept 11th.

I’ve extended the LaborDayFam 25% discount…you have just 24-hours to register by 2 pm tomorrow Friday, Sept 9th. Register NOW:  www.eventbrite.com/e/167881745821/?discount=LaborDayFam

Shift from Perfect Order to Perfect Harmony

I want to invite you to shift your perspective from perfect order to perfect harmony.

As some of you know, my husband and I have a 16-year-old Chocolate Labrador (Shadow), and last week I received a text from a dear friend with the most adorable picture of a 10-month-old Chocolate Labrador that needed a new home. I wasn’t interested in getting a second dog but my husband has been asking to get a second dog for about a year. My concern has always been my Shadow. How will he adjust as an only child?! But in seeing this sweet face I told myself that I would inquire and if it was meant to be it would be. We took our Shadow to meet the puppy and they did well and we slept on the decision before deciding to bring the puppy home this past Friday. We knew our 16 years old would take some time before he would adjust to our new family of four but neither of us knew what to expect when integrating a new dog into the pack. However, we learned quickly that it will take some time and that’s when we shifted our routines from perfect order to perfect harmony.

This tip can apply to any situation especially for those of you who may have the “Stickler” as a top saboteur. It takes strong mental muscles not to allow your saboteurs to hijack your mind by a sudden change of routine or situation. 

Thanks to my work with Positive Intelligence (PQ), I’ve made Mental Fitness my X-Factor and I’ve helped my husband navigate his saboteurs as well.

The good news is that – you can too!

I invite you to join my next 6-week Mental Fitness Positive Intelligence Program starting September 11th.

As humans, it’s impossible for us to feel happy & joyful ALL the time. Our emotional hijackings often sabotage peak performance. Stress, anxiety, anger, disappointment, blame, guilt, sadness, and self-doubt attack everyone. 🤯

One of the best differentiators of world-class athletes vs. runner-ups is their ability to recover faster from mistakes, failures, or negative interactions. The best leaders, athletes, and entrepreneurs have strong mental muscles. 💪🏆

The quicker we can get ourselves centered and clear-headed, the more productive we will be. This program will teach you how to quiet the saboteurs that are running around in your head & strengthen your mental fitness muscles so that you can build your capacity to respond to life’s challenges with a positive mindset. It impacts peak performance, peace of mind and wellness, and healthy relationships. The foundations are based on Positive Psychology, Cognitive Psychology, and Performance Science.

You can learn more about the Positive Intelligence work here: https://www.positiveintelligence.com/program/ and you can take your free saboteur assessment by going to this link: https://assessment.positiveintelligence.com/saboteur/overview
If you take the assessment, don’t forget to share your results with me via email at vimari@beproductivecoaching.com

The program retails for $995 on the Positive Intelligence website, and as a Certified Mental Fitness Coach, I am able to bundle the program and offer you and your friends my support and coaching through the process. I cannot publish the bundle and discount, but I am happy to give you the details over the phone. I only have four seats left to fill for this next start date. If you are interested in participating or learning more, schedule a time on my calendar for us to speak by choosing a time before Friday that is most convenient for you www.beproductivecoaching.com/contact

This work is fantastic, and I would love for you to experience it with me! 

Hugs,
Vimari 

p.s. Meet Zeke! 
Small businesses grow by word of mouth and referrals. Refer a friend to any of my Career Strategy or High-Performance Coaching services and receive a $50.00 VISA/MC gift card. Thank you in advance for thinking of me!

The referral program applies to new clients only (previous and existing clients are not considered referrals). Gift cards will be sent out after the new client has paid for their service. Visit www.beproductivecoaching.com for a list of services.

5 Easy Mindfulness Exercises

I overheard a recent interview on one of the new’s channels as my husband was watching his daily COVID-19 update, and this time they had John Whyte the Chief Medical Officer, of WebMD, who was explaining that the most typed search on their website right now is for anxiety and depression symptoms. This didn’t surprise me knowing that many of us are experiencing high-stress levels and anxiety during this time of pandemic as we face COVID-19 and the global financial crisis. I was happy to see that this was finally a discussion on the news channels. 

I’ve always had an interest in mental health, I even wanted to major in psychology before getting caught up in my hospitality career. Then throughout the years, I’ve dealt first hand with the anxiety and depression of different family members including my mom, grandmother, and husband. As a coach, I’ve helped many of my clients incorporate practices to help avoid the onset of stress and anxiety from their careers. It was due to this interest that I decided to start my Face Everything & Rise, free weekly mental health support group during COVID-19.

One of the practices I incorporate is mindfulness. I happen to love mindfulness and have had my own practice for over 8 years. In this new post, I’d like to share with you 5 of my favorite mindfulness exercises. Before I do, in case you are not familiar with what mindfulness is, I’ll bring you up to speed quickly.

Lets first look at the definition of mindfulness according to the dictionary:

mind·ful·ness
/ˈmīn(d)f(ə)lnəs/
noun

1.
the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something.
“their mindfulness of the wider cinematic tradition”
2.
a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.

Next lets look at the overall benefits of mindfulness?

  • Improves overall health
  • Improves Cognition
  • Improves Performance
  • Brings Joy
  • Helps us sleep better
  • Improves self-esteem

Here are some ways that we can practice mindfulness:

  • Staying in the NOW
  • Meditating
  • Eating mindfully
  • Observing our breathing
  • Connecting to our senses
  • Listening to the sounds around us
  • Starting a gratitude practice

Here are the five simple mindfulness exercises that you can incorporate to help reduce stress and anxiety:

1) Color Walk (one of my favorites)
If you have a dog then you can practice this during your dog walks otherwise if you do not just simply go for a ten-minute walk by yourself. Pick a color that comes to your mind. During your walk, you will look for all the things that you can see in that color. Don’t focus on things, just focus on the color. You will be amazed at the things you see. At the end of your walk, think back about all the new things you saw.

Example:
Pick the color red. Notice the red flowers, a red car driving by, your neighbor’s red door, etc. Pick a different color each time.
Start in your block then go to new surroundings. You can also do this by walking around your home.

2) STOP: Take a Mindfulness Pause
When you notice that you are feeling overwhelmed, take a pause. Next follow these basic mindfulness practice instructions that will support re-engagement of your prefrontal cortex (our “logic center”) enabling you better access to your inner wisdom, awareness, and creative thinking.

  • Start by noticing or experiencing what is happening within your body at that moment.
  • Next, just sit with (allow) yourself to feel these sensations and breathe.
  • Whenever your mind wanders into the negative or overwhelming thoughts, simply return to noticing your body sensations.
  • After about 30 seconds notice if you feel a change in your sensations. What are you experiencing now?
  • Breathe into this new sensation and just notice your breath as it is.
  • This Mindfulness Pause takes less than two minutes, yet quickly creates a calmer space. Once in this calmer space, ask yourself what it is that you want to focus on that would have the greatest positive impact in the situation (or in the context of your bigger goals) and continue about your day.

3) Meet Each Day with the Best of Who You Are
This exercise has a small piece of pre-work, and is then followed by a mindfulness exercise to “meet each day with the best of who you are”. You can use this mindfulness practice daily or whenever you want to intentionally create your day.

Pre-work: Start by writing down what an ideal day might look like for you. Then explore what factors get in your way of creating your ideal day, and what would help you create it.

Here’s the Mindfulness Exercise to Meet Each Day with the Best of Who You Are:

  • Tune into the sensation of your feet on the floor (for about 30 seconds).
  • Next tune into the sensation of your breath (for about 30 seconds).
  • Then answer these 3 questions:
  • “What matters most to you today?”
  • “What would you like to let go of today?” (What isn’t serving you?)
  • “Who do you choose to be today?” (How will you express your values?)
  • Finally, to wrap-up, this exercise, return awareness to your breath as you invite yourself into this intention for your day (for at least 30 seconds).

4) FEEL Your Breathing for 20 Counts
This is a quick tool we coaches use with clients – and clients can use for themselves – when the stress and anxiety are extreme. You can use this easy exercise when you are feeling overwhelmed, stressed about a difficult decision, prior to meetings or difficult conversations, or following stressful incidents from which you need to cool down. Here’s how:

  • Start by sitting in a comfortable position, placing your feet on the floor.
  • Next, place one hand on your abdomen and then to place one hand over your heart.
  • Now simply breathe – without any need to control the breath – just breathe.
  • Count the out-breaths from 1 up to 20.
  • Notice when your thoughts distract you (without self-judgment or criticism), and then return your attention to your breathing.
  • Why this works: Feeling your chest and abdomen rise and fall under your hands signals to your brain that the threat is over, and instantly stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system (the “rest and digest” part of our nervous system) which then switches off the threat response activation to bring a sense of calm.

5) Simple Breathing Exercise
This is another quick breathing exercise that is easy and you can do it anywhere.

  • Start by sitting in a comfortable position, placing your feet on the floor with your back straight, shoulders down and chest up.
  • Next, place both hands on your thighs facing up or down whatever feels normal for you.
  • Now take 3 regular deep breaths – without any need to control the breath – just breathe.
  • Next, take a deep breath in counting the breath in from 1 up to 5 or 10.
  • Hold the breath for a count of 5 to 10 (same count as your deep breath in).
  • Breath out counting the out-breaths from 1 up to 5 or 10 (always use the same number you used to take your deep breath in).
  • Repeat this 3 times and then notice how you feel. You should feel much better. If you don’t then repeat this breathwork 3 more times.

I hope these exercises are helpful to you. If you decide to start your mindfulness practice please email me and let me know how it’s going. I’d love to hear from you!

How to Deal with Stress, Worry & Anxiety During COVID-19

Stress, worry, and anxiety are common problems that many of us experience from time to time. However, as everyone knows, we are living in uncertain times right now as we face the Coronavirus Pandemic. As humans, during uncertain times, our stress, worry, and anxiety accelerate, and this pandemic has done just that for many. The world, as we knew it has changed drastically in the last few weeks. As Americans, this is the first time we are experiencing anything of this caliber. Given the news coverage, it is hard not to worry about what this all means for our loved ones and for us.

The pandemic has already caused a financial crisis for many industries. One of those industries is the Hospitality Industry, where thousands of people have been laid off or furloughed from one day to the other. For those dealing with the loss of a job on top of the unknown, it can feel incredibly overwhelming, leading to anxiety or depression.

We all handle our stress and our emotions differently, and this is something we need to keep in mind as we practice social distancing. We are left at home with our loved ones, and this new normal has us together 24/7, which for many, could be an adjustment that takes time.

Like you and most households, I’ve experienced this in my own home in the last couple of weeks. I’ve always worked from home, so that for me is not different. But like many, my spouse is now at home also. This is not a bad thing; however, we both handle stress differently, and this pandemic has created another level of stress for us. 

You see, I handle things by continuing with my routines and keeping myself busy. On the other hand, my husband wants to be informed and is glued to the news channels. I’ve maintained my morning routines with prayer, dog walks, and yoga. He has had trouble sleeping and, as a result, feels irritated. My spiritual meetings have moved to Zoom meetings, and he has disconnected himself from his meetings. The differences in our self-care routines have shown. I am not as stressed, and his anxiety levels have increased.  

I have to admit that the first week of this new household routine took a toll on us. Our patience with each other decreased, and we argued more. But then one day, after asking myself what could be happening, I realized that his mood swings were coming from a place of fear. Fear for our future and what can happen to us. That’s when I realized that for us to get back to loving each other, I needed to show compassion and my routine needed to include him. 

I share this with you because I know we are not alone. I know there are many couples and households that may be experiencing the same challenges and I want you to know that you are not alone. This is the time that we all need to be compassionate and loving towards one another, even when we don’t feel like it. 

Worry and fear come from thinking about the future. It is natural to worry during uncertain times like these. But if you feel that your anxiety is becoming excessive and taking over your life, then it’s crucial to take steps to manage your wellbeing with self-care.

How do you know when worry is taking over your life?

  • You have restlessness, unable to relax or problems sleeping that can include strange dreams/nightmares.
  • You feel upset, short-tempered, or exhausted all the time. 
  • You are experiencing difficulty concentrating, staying focused, or working.
  • You feel unexplained muscle tension, aches, and pains.

In addition to compassion, it is essential to practice self-care techniques. One of my favorite self-care techniques is mindfulness. Mindfulness is a technique that will help you cope with the worry. Mindfulness is staying in the present. If you feel any of the symptoms listed above, then this is the time to stay in the moment and not think about what could happen. Mindfulness will help you do this.

Here are a few mindfulness exercises that you can do to help you deal with your worry and anxiety:

  • Focus on your breath throughout the day. Make sure you are taking deep breaths. Take 10 deep breaths when you feel the worry or anxiety coming on.
  • Pick a color and take a walk. As you walk, look around for all the things you can identify that are in that color. This will take your mind off the negativity.
  • Daily Journal: A daily practice can help you release your anxiety. Journal about how you feel and what you can do to release those feelings or keep a gratitude journal.

The unknown can be scary. Self-care and compassion are most important now more than ever. It is essential to take this time to do what makes you feel good. To be you while caring for your loved ones too.

Another way to look after yourself is by keeping a daily routine. This doesn’t have to be super structured, but it should include:

  1. Things that give you a sense of achievement: Cleaning out closets, doing your taxes, taking an online course, etc.
  2. Things that help you feel close and connected: Calling friends and family, setting up a Zoom call so that you can all see each other, or playing a card game at home.
  3. Things that bring you pleasure and joy: Reading a book, binge-watching your favorite series, dancing, singing, doing something creative, or trying something new.

Lastly, it’s okay to feel – move through your emotions. It’s okay to cry, shout, or scream. Just be mindful not to take it out on your loved ones, and if your loved ones need to cry, shout or scream, encourage them to do so and be there for them. We are all in this together, and we can get through it by taking care of ourselves and each other.

I am going to start a free support group via Zoom, and it will take place weekly on Wednesdays from noon to 1 pm (EST).  Everyone is invited. These will be purely support sessions, there will not be much structure, and I will not be selling anything at the end. We may have some topics to help us get our conversations started, and that will be the only structure. The idea is to have a support group that is a safe space where we can all be authentic as we continue to face the uncertain future of Covid-19.

Edited 3/30/20: Register on Evenbrite If you are interested in participating by clicking on this link: https://face-everything-and-rise-free-weekly-support-group.eventbrite.com

You will receive a link for the Zoom call once you register. The first call will take place this coming Wed, April 1st. If you know of anyone that may be interested, feel free to forward this article and/or just give them my email address.

Let’s keep ourselves healthy – mind, body, and soul. 

Blessings to all,

Vimari